mmmhellooo?

Buddhists

I don't have no incense. Will Febreze do?

"Vietvenese" Doctor

Of course I don't judge no one, but them people down there, they're all Buddhists. Which means they burn incense and chant and carry on. I guess that has its appeals but you know them people ain't saved. You can't be saved and pray to big ol' fat Buddha.

Mormon Wife

I would have never signed up for this thing if I'd knowed we'd be going 700,000 miles across the desert lookin' for Zion.

Lutherans

Martin Luther founded this thing ... he went and wrote 95 things on the wall and went on a diet of worms. Now you know that takes real commitment to just eat nothing but worms ... for the Lord.

E.R.

Whoaaa! I fell back and hit my head. It's like I told that young Vietnamese doctor, 'It's not the first time. It won't be the last time.'

Episcopal Perspectives

Now what would you think if they put your husband in Reynolds Wrap?

Betty Don't Know

A dingo ate my Betty.

Cursillo

You could have heard a pin drop when I got through with my testimony.

Crazy

Victoria Gotti ... She has lips like a damn catfish.

Betty for Nixon

I think we should have a President whose wife doesn't say anything.